One More Push

There's something about hanging out with new people, or people you don't get to see often enough. It's fun listening to new perspectives and new personalities, watching the dynamics in different groups. And different groups have different bonds, different ways of being supportive. I could not ask for a more perfect core group of friends; they're supportive and understanding and loyal; everything friends should be. I feel safe with them, and I know that I can tell them anything ask them anything, without worrying about what they think of me.

Christmas time, though, is when everyone comes home, everyone sees each other again. It's when you get to reconnect with friends you haven't seen in months, maybe haven't even talked to in so long. And you catch up on each other's lives, make up for lost time.

I don't know if it's because I've forgotten what this is like, it having been so long, or if there's just been something about the past few months, but I have loved this lately. The commiserating, the agreeing, disagreeing, advising from "new" sources, I come away from each brunch, party, and dinner energized. I think it's because these people push me in different directions than the people I see on a more regular basis. They have different priorities, and that bleeds into their personalities, and into me. They force me to look at parts of my life and myself I've been neglecting, push me to get over the fear and just. do. it. I'm terrified of jumping over a cliff, and they're all "look, it's not a cliff. It's like a curb. A tiny one. I do it all the time! It's easy! Just do it, you'll see! Seriously."

Somehow it doesn't seem so scary anymore. I think I will.