Christmas Shopping with the Stars

So, for reasons unknown, my brother gets the Neiman Marcus catalog. We've been getting it (his mail still gets sent here, regardless of the fact that he's moved out) for a few months now, and I've always looked at it with a mixture of wonder and incredulity; the prices for some (hideous) items are nothing short of astounding. Although it did explain how the store stays open; if it sells a total of 3 items, their quarter is made.

And then, this week, we got the Christmas Book. Now some of the pages are filled with the usual fare; $500 crystal Buddhas, ugly dresses, Manolo Blahniks. In there somewhere is a Louis Vuitton Jewelry Box, for a whopping $44,200. But then there are the Fantasy Gifts.

Would you like a personal Photo Booth? Only $20,000 (I know, you can buy two photo booths and still save money compared to the jewelry box. It's like budgeting on a whole new level). How about a Grand Empire Railroad? Large enough that your son can ride it, it includes a locomotive, cars, caboose, station, and 1000 feet of track. I kid you not. For the steal of a deal of $200,000.

Not extravagant enough? How about a private concert with Sir Elton John (production costs and travel costs not included)? Yes, Sir Elton John himself will come to you, and play for you and your friends. As a special bonus gift, you will also receive an Elton John Signature Series Red Baby Grand Piano, yours to keep. Limited offer, only one will be sold! Yours for the low, low price of $1.5 million dollars. (To be entirely fair, the 1.5 million goes to the AIDS Foundation.)

And if you'd rather hold the concert away from your home, you can always fly there in your brand new Skycar. For only $3.5 million, you can own your very own, real-life, flying car. Because ground transportation? Is for the poor.

I wonder if that's where Bill Gates buys his Christmas gifts. I did notice there were no gold-plated monkey sock-puppets. Clearly, someone at Neiman Marcus is dropping the ball.