Change your thoughts and you change your world.
-Norman Vincent Peale
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Amazing Night
Every Wednesday, the sorority has meeting. While there's definitely a lot of work that gets done at meeting, it's also one of the few times that everyone gets together, and trust me, having a group of 50 girls that you see at least once a week goes a long way towards making UBC more friendly. Today was our last meeting of the year. That's not to say we won't see each other; there are a few more events left before exams roll around. It does mean that this was the last formal meeting I'd have with a lot of my best friends. These girls are all graduating; they won't even be on campus anymore. There is not one girl who's leaving that hasn't been in the sorority for every year that I have. Five girls I joined with are leaving, eleven girls in all. Every year, girls graduate and the chapter changes, but this year I'll feel it the most.
I don't mean to be all maudlin; it was an incredible night. Panhellenic (like the government for sororities) awards were given out tonight, and we did amazingly well. We won the sports award, one of our girls won the top athlete award, and we won top all round sorority. So congratulations us, and specifically J, Tf, and T. Especially T, who was president this last year and worked bloody hard for this award.
Also, I was given so many nice things today! I got a lion stuffy as a gift, who I've named Milton. And from myself (heh), I got these markers for my windows, so I can write pretty things on them. I also got three really nice letters from girls, which are really sweet and made me cry.
Everything is good right now.
I don't mean to be all maudlin; it was an incredible night. Panhellenic (like the government for sororities) awards were given out tonight, and we did amazingly well. We won the sports award, one of our girls won the top athlete award, and we won top all round sorority. So congratulations us, and specifically J, Tf, and T. Especially T, who was president this last year and worked bloody hard for this award.
Also, I was given so many nice things today! I got a lion stuffy as a gift, who I've named Milton. And from myself (heh), I got these markers for my windows, so I can write pretty things on them. I also got three really nice letters from girls, which are really sweet and made me cry.
Everything is good right now.
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
Easter....Lobster?
That's what I had for Easter dinner, lobster. And it was awesome.
I feel like I've been MIA for weeks, but it's really only been a few days, which just goes to show how important sleep can be. Anyhow, my weekend was good, if not relaxing. On Friday I ran errands and hung out with Jo for now, and with Jo's puppy, who is really cute, but is under the impression that I am a giant walking version of one of her toys, which is a little unfortunate.
Saturday and Sunday I worked. Sunday night, we went to the boathouse, where I had lobster. Oh, lobster. How I love you. I could write you a song. In fact, I have written you a song. It goes like this:
Lobsters come both big and small,
You kind of walk, you kind of crawl,
In colours ranging brown to blue,
but you are red when I eat you.
You have such a hard shell to crack,
but tastiness you never lack,
with butter or not, it's always true,
Lobster lobster, I love to eat you!
Yesterday, I hung out with Girly, and saw Guess Who with Girly, J, and D. It was pretty funny; Bernie Mac is humourous person. I have to say though, I have very little patience for "the protective father" figure, in life and in movies, especially when the daughter seems quite capable of taking care of herself. Anyhow, it was still a good movie.
My iPod mini is here! It got here yesterday. Since my computer is pretty messed up, I couldn't get it up and running until this morning, after about 9 hours work (i was up til 3 last night trying to get it running. 3!). But it is pretty, and pink, and I love it. I named it Ophelia, after a cat who was especially princessly. Even though it's running, getting songs on the thing is a project vaguely reminiscent of a math problem. But Ophelia is beautiful, and I love her, and at this very instant, she is singing the sweet notes of "Theme from My Dog Skip" into my ears.
Tomorrow: the passport office! I know you're jealous, and if you ask very nicely, I may even let you come with me.
I feel like I've been MIA for weeks, but it's really only been a few days, which just goes to show how important sleep can be. Anyhow, my weekend was good, if not relaxing. On Friday I ran errands and hung out with Jo for now, and with Jo's puppy, who is really cute, but is under the impression that I am a giant walking version of one of her toys, which is a little unfortunate.
Saturday and Sunday I worked. Sunday night, we went to the boathouse, where I had lobster. Oh, lobster. How I love you. I could write you a song. In fact, I have written you a song. It goes like this:
Lobsters come both big and small,
You kind of walk, you kind of crawl,
In colours ranging brown to blue,
but you are red when I eat you.
You have such a hard shell to crack,
but tastiness you never lack,
with butter or not, it's always true,
Lobster lobster, I love to eat you!
Yesterday, I hung out with Girly, and saw Guess Who with Girly, J, and D. It was pretty funny; Bernie Mac is humourous person. I have to say though, I have very little patience for "the protective father" figure, in life and in movies, especially when the daughter seems quite capable of taking care of herself. Anyhow, it was still a good movie.
My iPod mini is here! It got here yesterday. Since my computer is pretty messed up, I couldn't get it up and running until this morning, after about 9 hours work (i was up til 3 last night trying to get it running. 3!). But it is pretty, and pink, and I love it. I named it Ophelia, after a cat who was especially princessly. Even though it's running, getting songs on the thing is a project vaguely reminiscent of a math problem. But Ophelia is beautiful, and I love her, and at this very instant, she is singing the sweet notes of "Theme from My Dog Skip" into my ears.
Tomorrow: the passport office! I know you're jealous, and if you ask very nicely, I may even let you come with me.
Friday, March 25, 2005
Update
So ironwoman was amazing. Evi was there, and I'm sure she'd agree. My friend from highschool actually won, and my other friend won for our division, so woo! It was honestly one of the most impressive things I've ever seen, right along with the crazy runners of Olympics 2004 fame. That was sheer madness.
In other news, I'm going to MEXICO! So excited, I leave right after exams. I'm going with a group of friends, and it's going to be so much fun! Woo Mazatlan!
Also, I have an iPod mini, in pink, coming my way, so woo new gadgets! Really, lately it's just been one good thing after another. I'm okay with that.
In other news, I'm going to MEXICO! So excited, I leave right after exams. I'm going with a group of friends, and it's going to be so much fun! Woo Mazatlan!
Also, I have an iPod mini, in pink, coming my way, so woo new gadgets! Really, lately it's just been one good thing after another. I'm okay with that.
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
Quote of the Week
More of a conversation than a quote, this time.
J: How do you think rabbits became the mascot of Easter?
Tdot: Eggs.
(Pause, then simultaneously)
Tdot: Wait, that doesn't make sense.
N: Rabbits don't lay eggs!
J: How do you think rabbits became the mascot of Easter?
Tdot: Eggs.
(Pause, then simultaneously)
Tdot: Wait, that doesn't make sense.
N: Rabbits don't lay eggs!
Storm the Wall, People!
So I've been watching Storm the Wall for the past week, which is a huge intramural event at UBC. There's a swim, sprint, bike, run, and then a 12 foot wall to scale at the end, generally done in relay. The sorority has a few teams, and then there's iron man, ironwoman and super ironman/woman. Those entail doing the whole thing by yourself, and then scaling the wall with various degrees of assistance. Ironman - one guy at the top. Ironwoman - a person at the bottom. Super ironwoman - a person at the top. Super ironman - no one. Super ironman is ridiculously impressive. I mean, all the ironpeople are impressive, but watching someone conquer a twelve foot wall alone is incredible.
A girl from the sorority is doing ironwoman, and watching her go over the wall on Monday was amazing. She is honestly the best athlete I've ever met; there's no sport she seems to not be good at. She's competing again, in the final, tomorrow at 12:30, and I'm so going to be there. It turns out that one of her competitors is an old friend from highschool, so I'll be cheering two girls on. Wooo!
A girl from the sorority is doing ironwoman, and watching her go over the wall on Monday was amazing. She is honestly the best athlete I've ever met; there's no sport she seems to not be good at. She's competing again, in the final, tomorrow at 12:30, and I'm so going to be there. It turns out that one of her competitors is an old friend from highschool, so I'll be cheering two girls on. Wooo!
Friday, March 18, 2005
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Back to Normal
It's funny, I don't remember when things began to be "normal" again. I just realized today that while I still think about it all a lot, still wonder and hurt and wish, life is...normal. I don't wake up upset, the first thing I think isn't "I'm still alone" anymore; my thoughts aren't even really tinged with that pang of sadness that used to follow me around. I don't know when it started, it seems so long since I've been like this, this free.
That's not to say it isn't there; it is. Sometimes, just waiting for the bus or washing my hair, somehow my mind will wander down that path, where all those questions are still there, waiting for answers. But I know I won't answer them, that I probably don't want to. And a minute later, it all goes away, and I'm back to wondering when the damn bus will arrive, or why my brother's shampoo is so strongly scented that my towels are permeated.
I can listen to sad songs, now. I get sad, but not noticeably more so than I would have before. And when I daydream, as often as not, it isn't at all involved. I don't get that almost painful impulse to call. When something good or bad happens, I automatically think to call T or Girly, not him.
I still avoid certain things, certain places. But some of that is just out of habit now. Maybe eventually I'll stop avoiding them. But for now, this is enough. This is better than enough. This is perfect.
That's not to say it isn't there; it is. Sometimes, just waiting for the bus or washing my hair, somehow my mind will wander down that path, where all those questions are still there, waiting for answers. But I know I won't answer them, that I probably don't want to. And a minute later, it all goes away, and I'm back to wondering when the damn bus will arrive, or why my brother's shampoo is so strongly scented that my towels are permeated.
I can listen to sad songs, now. I get sad, but not noticeably more so than I would have before. And when I daydream, as often as not, it isn't at all involved. I don't get that almost painful impulse to call. When something good or bad happens, I automatically think to call T or Girly, not him.
I still avoid certain things, certain places. But some of that is just out of habit now. Maybe eventually I'll stop avoiding them. But for now, this is enough. This is better than enough. This is perfect.
Sunday, March 13, 2005
Everything but the Formal
Night Before
Pack bags for tomorrow, taking care to double-bag the dress in nondescript opaque bags, for fear of maternal disapproval at skirt length. Look at skirt yourself, and wonder what the hell you were thinking. Go over mental list five times, so as to Not Forget Anything. At each pass of the list. Remember something new. Halfway through the sixth pass, think "blow this". Go to bathroom.
Look in mirror. Notice that at 21, you have creases in your skin. realize that while you don't have any $5000 creams to erase wrinkles, you do have Photoshop. Make a mental note to screw posterity and smooth all creases with the wonders of digital altering. While forming this plan, suddenly notice that your eyes have slightly different eyelids, and therefore are of different shapes. Wrack brain, find nothing about how to fix facial asymmetry, curse parents for the clearly inferior genes you were given. Stare at your eyes longer and longer, getting increasingly annoyed, until your brother walks by the bathroom, walks back, and asks
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Painting my toe nails"
"...Right."
Paint toenails.
Day Of
Kelly Clarkson screams "Since You've Been Gone" at 6:00 am. You curse the radio, roll out of bed, crawl into the shower and proceed to scrape a blade over your skin while still half asleep. You get dressed, and grab the prepacked bags. Get on bus, go to work. Watch clock obsessively until you are free to go. Run out door to catch bus, and walk briskly to hair salon while scanning windows for cute handbags for formal. Reflect that this moment of multitasking "handbag" and "hair" is probably more air-headed than your entire year thus far. Prove yourself wrong by spending the rest of the walk reminiscing at the other ditzy things you've done since January.
Get hair done by fabulous gay hairdresser, and discuss boys, and how they are overrated and clearly not worth anyone's time. Agree that if only sexuality was a choice, you'd both choose women. Hair done, you are told by another stylist (female) that your hair will turn you into a sex machine, and that classy promiscuity relies only on the hair style. As your stylist swipes your visa, he says matter-of-factly "it's true."
Limo
A tricky game of photo-op musical chairs is played, with the added challenges of low ceilings, moving floors, alcohol and short dresses. Hilarity, and photos, ensue. Suddenly the limo stops, throwing you into the torso of your friend's date, and throwing the random guy who missed his limo into your hand, sending a half-empty glass of champagne flying, to land perfectly upright on the floor, devoid of any champagne. Your neighbour thanks god the window was open, while a pedestrian finds himself sprayed with eau de henckel trocken. You all look out the window, and spy fellow formal-goers. You have arrived.
Pack bags for tomorrow, taking care to double-bag the dress in nondescript opaque bags, for fear of maternal disapproval at skirt length. Look at skirt yourself, and wonder what the hell you were thinking. Go over mental list five times, so as to Not Forget Anything. At each pass of the list. Remember something new. Halfway through the sixth pass, think "blow this". Go to bathroom.
Look in mirror. Notice that at 21, you have creases in your skin. realize that while you don't have any $5000 creams to erase wrinkles, you do have Photoshop. Make a mental note to screw posterity and smooth all creases with the wonders of digital altering. While forming this plan, suddenly notice that your eyes have slightly different eyelids, and therefore are of different shapes. Wrack brain, find nothing about how to fix facial asymmetry, curse parents for the clearly inferior genes you were given. Stare at your eyes longer and longer, getting increasingly annoyed, until your brother walks by the bathroom, walks back, and asks
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Painting my toe nails"
"...Right."
Paint toenails.
Day Of
Kelly Clarkson screams "Since You've Been Gone" at 6:00 am. You curse the radio, roll out of bed, crawl into the shower and proceed to scrape a blade over your skin while still half asleep. You get dressed, and grab the prepacked bags. Get on bus, go to work. Watch clock obsessively until you are free to go. Run out door to catch bus, and walk briskly to hair salon while scanning windows for cute handbags for formal. Reflect that this moment of multitasking "handbag" and "hair" is probably more air-headed than your entire year thus far. Prove yourself wrong by spending the rest of the walk reminiscing at the other ditzy things you've done since January.
Get hair done by fabulous gay hairdresser, and discuss boys, and how they are overrated and clearly not worth anyone's time. Agree that if only sexuality was a choice, you'd both choose women. Hair done, you are told by another stylist (female) that your hair will turn you into a sex machine, and that classy promiscuity relies only on the hair style. As your stylist swipes your visa, he says matter-of-factly "it's true."
Limo
A tricky game of photo-op musical chairs is played, with the added challenges of low ceilings, moving floors, alcohol and short dresses. Hilarity, and photos, ensue. Suddenly the limo stops, throwing you into the torso of your friend's date, and throwing the random guy who missed his limo into your hand, sending a half-empty glass of champagne flying, to land perfectly upright on the floor, devoid of any champagne. Your neighbour thanks god the window was open, while a pedestrian finds himself sprayed with eau de henckel trocken. You all look out the window, and spy fellow formal-goers. You have arrived.
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
My Nose is Chapped. Ow.
You know how for every cold and flu, there's always that one day where you don't think you could possibly feel worse? When you wake up at 4 am, because your eyes are all hot and sore, and your nose and throat feel like they're sunburned?
That was today.
Since noon, I've used half a box of kleenex (I know because I opened that box at noon), drank 5 pots of tea (in an effort to shake this stupid cold), and coughed enough to make that guy with tuberculosis at the back of the class cringe and put on his SARS mask.
Goal for tonight? Sleep. I plan on putting a damp facecloth in my room to promote air humidity, and maybe using an extra pillow so that I can breathe more easily. If that doesn't work, I'm bringing on the drugs.
That was today.
Since noon, I've used half a box of kleenex (I know because I opened that box at noon), drank 5 pots of tea (in an effort to shake this stupid cold), and coughed enough to make that guy with tuberculosis at the back of the class cringe and put on his SARS mask.
Goal for tonight? Sleep. I plan on putting a damp facecloth in my room to promote air humidity, and maybe using an extra pillow so that I can breathe more easily. If that doesn't work, I'm bringing on the drugs.
Saturday, March 05, 2005
Coordinated!
Yesterday, being Friday, we had a dodgeball game. People, I am proud to announce that I have grasped another aspect of the game of dodgeball; catching. If you catch the ball, not only is the person who threw it at you out, but you get to bring one of your fallen comrades back in. And on Friday? I caught the ball three times. I was an all-star, I tell you.
I love how when the game was over, everyone was like "whoa, you were awesome!". I mean, there are some girls on our team who do that several times over, consistently. You know who you are, athletes. But since I'm generally a bit of a spaz, I get major praise. It's like Calvin said: "the lower I keep people's expectations, the less I have to do to impress them". Of course, I'm not keeping people's expectations low on purpose, so that's a little different.
(Also, I now have a dress for formal, and it is HOT)
I love how when the game was over, everyone was like "whoa, you were awesome!". I mean, there are some girls on our team who do that several times over, consistently. You know who you are, athletes. But since I'm generally a bit of a spaz, I get major praise. It's like Calvin said: "the lower I keep people's expectations, the less I have to do to impress them". Of course, I'm not keeping people's expectations low on purpose, so that's a little different.
(Also, I now have a dress for formal, and it is HOT)
Wednesday, March 02, 2005
Encounter of the Evil Kind
Snapshots of my Tuesday:
As heard while reading in the Student Union Building at UBC (my thoughts in italic)
Girl 1: I mean, what is her problem? She's so upset all the time, like "Oh god, he broke up with me!" I know she's my best friend, but, I mean, get over it! It's been a week!"
A week? She's upset because her friend isn't over being dumped in a week?
Girl 2: Oh, I know, and all she does is mope around and cry. It's sooo annoying. How long were they going out for, anyway?
Girl 1: Three years. Ugh, I can't believe she's so annoying.
Three years?! Of course she's upset! Jaisus!
Girl 1: Who could we set her up with? What about John?
Girl 2: No, he's too good for her.
Girl 1: Yeah, same as Tim and Peter. Ugh, I wouldn't want to inflict her on anyone.
This is your best friend? I joke about going to hell, but you probably have a penthouse suite of torture waiting for you!
Girl 1: You know what we should do? We should take her out and get her totally drunk, and the first guy who hits on her, we'll send them home together.
WHAT?!
Girl 2: We should totally do that! It'd be so funny!
Girl 1: I know, and it's totally normal. It's called "getting over someone".
Actually, for her it's called "rape". For you, it's called "endangering your friend's life" or "whoring out your friend".
[As I get up to leave]
Girl 1: So, let's toally do that this weekend!
Couple next to me, to each other as I leave;
Girl: My god, do you hear these girls?
Guy: I'm trying not to.
In conclusion, I feel really sorry for their friend, and am extremely thankful that I have better friends than she does. Ech.
As heard while reading in the Student Union Building at UBC (my thoughts in italic)
Girl 1: I mean, what is her problem? She's so upset all the time, like "Oh god, he broke up with me!" I know she's my best friend, but, I mean, get over it! It's been a week!"
A week? She's upset because her friend isn't over being dumped in a week?
Girl 2: Oh, I know, and all she does is mope around and cry. It's sooo annoying. How long were they going out for, anyway?
Girl 1: Three years. Ugh, I can't believe she's so annoying.
Three years?! Of course she's upset! Jaisus!
Girl 1: Who could we set her up with? What about John?
Girl 2: No, he's too good for her.
Girl 1: Yeah, same as Tim and Peter. Ugh, I wouldn't want to inflict her on anyone.
This is your best friend? I joke about going to hell, but you probably have a penthouse suite of torture waiting for you!
Girl 1: You know what we should do? We should take her out and get her totally drunk, and the first guy who hits on her, we'll send them home together.
WHAT?!
Girl 2: We should totally do that! It'd be so funny!
Girl 1: I know, and it's totally normal. It's called "getting over someone".
Actually, for her it's called "rape". For you, it's called "endangering your friend's life" or "whoring out your friend".
[As I get up to leave]
Girl 1: So, let's toally do that this weekend!
Couple next to me, to each other as I leave;
Girl: My god, do you hear these girls?
Guy: I'm trying not to.
In conclusion, I feel really sorry for their friend, and am extremely thankful that I have better friends than she does. Ech.
Tuesday, March 01, 2005
Quote of the Week
"Friendship is certainly the finest balm for the pangs of disappointed love."
- Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey
- Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey
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