A good friend of mine, who is awesome, was recently having boy-trouble. Unfortunately, it wasn't the 'talk to him and it'll get better' kind of boy trouble, it was the 'this sucks' kind. So we were discussing the problem, and I gave her two possible solutions, which I might add could be used for any situation in someone is being a total ass (we will call this figure 'the annoyance' from now on);
1. Kick him. Hard.
2. Make a pinata of his head, fill it with candy, hang it from a tree, and beat it with a stick. This is an older idea of mine, but it is very versatile in its possible applications.
There are several advantages to the pinata plan. One, when you beat a pinata, it is not a crime. This is in direct contrast to beating a person, which is most definitely a crime. Two, the venting of the rage can not only be done without the annoyance's presence, but without his/her knowledge. And finally, were you to beat the annoyance, would candy fall out, rewarding you for your exertions? I didn't think so.
I rest my case.
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